


Punchline Takes a Hit

by combeferre_writer01



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: First Date, Friends to Lovers, Hotch is doing his best, JJ saves the day again, Reid has Autism, autistic!Reid, awkward baby boy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:47:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26923108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/combeferre_writer01/pseuds/combeferre_writer01
Summary: Hotch tells the team a joke for Jack and Spencer doesn't get it right away. When he finally does, his ridiculous laughter awakens feelings Morgan didn't know he had.
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Moreid - Relationship
Comments: 9
Kudos: 277





	1. What Has Two Butts and Kills People?

Hotch came out of the office and entered the bullpen. “I almost forgot that Jack told me a joke this morning and wanted me to tell it to you all. What has two butts and kills people?” 

Elle and Morgan looked at each other, running possible answers through their minds. Hitman; no. Sadist; no. 

“An assassin,” Hotch chuckled. 

Morgan and Elle laughed. “Where’d he hear that?” Morgan wondered. 

“Someone at school heard it from their brother,” Hotch shrugged. “He was proud that he got me with it.” 

The three looked at Reid who was still contemplating the joke. His brow was furrowed, his eyes seemingly staring at the floor but not focussing. Assassin?

“Reid?” Hotch questioned. 

“I-I don’t…” he shook his head with a frown.

“You’ll figure it out,” Morgan reassured. “A hint: don’t overthink it.” 

Hotch chuckled again at the perplexed look on the youngest agent’s face and went back to his office. 

Reid got a fresh cup of coffee and sat back down. On a scrap of paper, he wrote the joke’s question and the punchline under it. Writing out the punchline was what got the joke through to him. 

The young doctor clamped a hand over his mouth, giggling. His eyes were clenched shut as he laughed. The two co-workers sitting around him shared a look. 

“You good, Pretty Boy?” Morgan chortled. 

“You just got the joke, didn’t you?” Elle sighed. 

Reid finally managed to swallow his mouthful of coffee and burst out laughing. He nodded in answer to Elle’s question. Hotch could hear Reid’s laughter from his office and couldn’t help laugh. The young genius could pinpoint where the unsub lived based on his handwriting in moments yet it took minutes for him to understand a simple quip. 

Elle spared Morgan a look, her smile softening when she noticed a different light behind the man’s eyes as he watched Reid trying to contain his laughter. 

After a few moments, Reid managed to calm himself but was left with the hiccups. Every time Reid hiccupped, Morgan would chuckle. At first, she thought it amusing. Now though? Five minutes later? It was driving her insane. 

The brunette ventured into the breakroom and thrust a cold bottle of water into Reid’s hands when she came back.

* * *

JJ and Reid were talking in the breakroom later in the afternoon. 

“Did you hear the joke Hotch told earlier?” Reid giggled at the thought of the joke.

“No. What was it?” JJ grinned at her child-like friend.

Reid managed to tell the joke- a smile constantly on his face and through giggles. 

“Want some Tums for those butterflies, loverboy?” Elle teased suddenly, making Morgan jump. 

“Jesus, Elle!” Morgan hissed from where he sat at his desk. 

“You’re gonna talk to him, right?”

“I talk to him all the time,” Morgan shrugged, trying to dismiss the woman’s teasing. 

Elle gave him an incredulous look. 

“I- No. Not about this.”

“Why not? There’s nothing in the books saying agents can’t date.” Elle crossed her arms over her chest, tapping the toe of her shoe waiting for an answer. 

“I...It’s not a smart move.” 

“Not a smart move?” Elle scoffed. “It’s one of the smartest moves you could make.”

“What move?” Reid wondered as he and JJ appeared in the doorway. 

“Pulling his head out of his ass long enough to breath,” Elle covered, ignoring  Morgan’s glare. 

Reid’s brow furrowed again in confusion, but he dismissed it and headed back to his desk to finish the consult he was working on. 

“Butterflies?” JJ looked between the two profilers with a knowing smirk. 

“Does everyone know?” Morgan threw his arms up. 

“I’m not a profiler and I know, so probably.” JJ shrugged. 

Morgan glanced at Reid with wide eyes, silently asking the two women if Reid might know as well. The women glanced at Reid. “No,” they answered at the same time. 

“I’ll give Garcia a heads up that you’re gonna want to talk to her for date ideas.” JJ beamed and left with a bounce in her step.

* * *

“Pretty Boy.” Morgan caught Reid’s elbow as the younger agent pressed the down button for the elevator. 

Spencer looked at Morgan with widened eyes, shock evident in them. “Yeah?” 

“Wanna get some coffee that’s supposed to be sweet without rotting your teeth?” Morgan offered. “My treat.” 

“Oh. Sure,” Reid smiled. “The coffee they have here isn’t good enough?” he teased. 

“Do you see the ability to steam milk?” Morgan smirked. 

“Fair point. But if you want  _ frothy _ milk, it’s not hard to do. I mean, you could buy a  hand-held frother- they don’t cost much. Or if you have a jar- like a canning jar- then you fill it a third of the way and shake it like crazy until the milk doubles in size. It only takes about a minute, actually,” Reid explained. 

As the two got into the elevator, Reid missed the thumbs up JJ and Garcia were sending Morgan’s way with wide smiles. 

“You don’t usually drink coffee after four unless we have a case. What changed?” Reid’s question pulled Morgan’s wandering mind back to the present. 

“Uh...it’s just one of those cooler fall days, you know? Gets ya in the mood for warmer drinks.” 

“Have you had spiced cider?” Reid asked, excitement in his eyes. “My favorite coffee house only has it from October first to December 31.” 

“You never really struck me as a cider kinda guy,” Morgan noted. 

“It has to be real cider. The stuff they sell at the store isn’t worth the money. It’s just over priced, juice made from crab apples- not really crab apples, but it’s sour enough to be. It has to be  _ real _ cider,” Reid explained. 

“If you like cider so much, have you had hard cider?” 

“I don’t drink,” Reid shook his head. “I like the usage of my frontal lobe and liver too much. Not to mention what it does to your kidneys and blood- Alcohol is just back for you. Some people swear that a glass of red wine is good for at the end of the day, but more current studies are finding that it’s not because it kicks your liver into hyper drive right before you lay down to go to bed so it actually keeps you up.” 

Morgan chuckled at Reid’s info-dumping. A lot of people found it annoying, but Morgan saw the truth behind it. The more the kid trusted you, the more he info-dumped. He wasn’t huge on physical touch from others- he, JJ, and Garcia were working on that- so he showed he cared by sharing his infinite knowledge with you. 

“Sorry.” Reid tugged the cuffs of his cardigan over his palms and fisted his hands. “I was rambling.” 

“It’s all good. I knew people thought wine could help disease- my aunt swears by it- but I didn’t know they were disproving it. I’ll have to send her some of those sources of yours, huh?” 

“I can forward them to you tomorrow,” Reid nodded.

* * *

Reid got up from their table to get them refills. They’d been chatting and working on a jigsaw puzzle at the back of the coffee house. Morgan sent a quick text to JJ. 

“ _ I don’t think he knows I asked him out. _ ” 

JJ giggled as she replied. “ _ So tell him you asked out. You know Spence. You have to be painfully clear. _ ” 

Reid sat back on the couch, handing Morgan one of the cups of spiced cider. “Do we have a case?” 

“Nah. Just JJ texting to see what’s up,” Morgan shrugged. He couldn’t help but admire Spencer. The younger man went right back to the puzzle, the awkward air floating miles above his head.


	2. Just Gotta Go With It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spencer debates the difference of love and transference. With some help help from a couple of friends, he finally gets the courage to ask out his crush.

JJ could tell from the second she laid eyes on Reid that something was off. She couldn’t tell if something bad happened, or if he was just thinking. Either way, the blonde figured that talking would do the young doctor some good. 

“Hey, Spence.” JJ approached the younger man. “Everything okay?” 

He looked up from his paperwork with a blank face but conflicted eyes. “Yeah. Why?” 

“You just seem a little quiet today. Are you sure everything’s going alright?” JJ cocked her head a little but made sure to keep her voice gentle. 

Oftentimes, one had to over express themselves for Reid to get their gestures. He had no problems reading potential unsubs or the families of victims, yet he couldn’t read his friends well. If something was wrong, he could tell immediately, he could tell they were happy because they were smiling and laughing. Just about anything else, though? Annoyance, anger, confusion, contentment, curiousness? He couldn’t tell. 

Reid started tugging firmly- not hard enough to hurt- on the hair at the nape of his neck. JJ noticed first as she was passing through the bullpen on her way to Hotch’s office with an armload of files. She quickly placed the files on Hotch’s desk and left before the man had a chance to say thank you. 

JJ placed her hands gently on Reid’s shoulder. “Spence? Let’s go talk, okay?” She helped the young doctor out of his seat and led him to her office. “You okay?” 

“Just...overthinking.” Spencer’s hand was still tugging at his hair and JJ found herself wondering if he even knew he was doing it. 

“Okay,” JJ nodded slowly. She handed Reid a pencil and a rubber band from her desk with one hand, easing Spencer’s hand from his hair with the other. “Is your mom okay?” she guessed.

“Fine.” Spencer took a deep breath and shakily released it. He started muttering under his breath and JJ frowned. 

“What?” 

“Transference happens when someone redirects their feelings or-or a desire for 

someone to an unrelated third party,” Reid recited. “Freud believed it happened more often when stemming from one’s childhood. But that doesn’t make- it can’t-” 

“Spence, Spence. Slow down. We can figure this out. Why do you think you’re transferring your feelings onto a third party?” JJ eased Reid to sit in her desk chair and he immediately started moving the swivel chair in semi-circles. 

“I have to be. He’s not even-” Spencer stopped and shook his head. 

“Who?” JJ tried to pry. 

“Morgan.”

“Morgan’s bi,” JJ offered. “Do you have feelings for Morgan?” 

“I can’t,” Spencer shook his head frantically. The sound that came out of his throat  when the rubber band snapped against his hand was nearly a whimper.

“Why not?” JJ cocked her head and sat on the corner of her over-cluttered desk. “Spence, it’s okay to develop feelings for people- especially someone you work with and see everyday.” 

“Not Morgan. He wasn’t trying to be romantic. He was just being a friend. Friends hang out after work. You and I aren’t dating and we go to the movies all the time.”

“Right,” JJ nodded. “Have you tried talking to Morgan about this?” JJ asked. 

“No. I can’t. It would mess everything up,” Spencer stopped spinning the chair. “It’s just transference. I think I like him because he was kind and yesterday was close to what a date is supposed to be.” 

“Are you sure it wasn’t a date?” JJ proposed. 

“It wasn’t. He would have told me.” 

“How did he ask you?” JJ’s brows furrowed together. 

Spencer’s eyes gained a distant look. “Pretty Boy? Yeah? Wanna get some coffee that’s supposed to be sweet without rotting your teeth? My treat. Oh. Sure. The coffee they have here isn’t good enough? Do you see the ability to steam mil-” 

“Wait, wait,” JJ stopped Reid from continuing the rest of the conservation. “Morgan offering to pay was the indication of it being a date.” 

It was Reid’s turn to frown. “How is that an indication of a date? That’s such an everyday thing- he pays for my coffee all the time.” His eyes widened. “Have we been on dates before I didn’t know?” 

“No, no, Spence, he specified that this time was his treat. It wasn’t a convenience where we were on a case and you both needed coffee. This was going out of the way after work instead of going home.” 

“I didn’t know… This isn’t transference?” Spencer’s brown eyes finally met JJ’s. 

“No. You two like each other. There’s nothing being transferred.” JJ wore a small,  encouraging smile.

* * *

Elle was a little more than confused when she got a text from Reid that night. It was pretty rare for the young man to contact anyone outside of work seeing he had such a strong dislike towards technology. 

The text read:  _ Are flowers too much for a first date? _

Elle shook her head with a soft smile.  _ Boys _ , she thought with a sigh. Regardless, she answered the poor boy’s text.  _ You have to be careful with roses. They mean different things. Roses are too strong.  _

Roses are too strong? Reid frowned and texted Hotch instead. He was married; he’d know about flower meanings, right? 

Hotch chuckled as he answered his phone. What’s so funny?” Haley asked. 

“Do you remember Dr. Spencer Reid?” Hotch looked at the blonde. 

“He’s the shy, Autistic boy, right?” She looked up from feeding Jack.

“Yeah. He just texted me  _ Do you know anything about flower symbolism? Elle says flowers have different messages _ .” Hotch’s thumb danced across the flip-phone’s buttons. 

“What are you telling him?”

“That roses have the highest chance of getting him into his date’s bed. Pink camellias and carnations are signs of love and longing; ferns represent new beginnings.” Hotch typed the names of the flowers, placing an equals sign before the meaning. 

“Do you know who his date is?”

“SSA Hotchner does not.” 

So yes he did.

* * *

Once Reid bought the flowers, he got into a cab and headed for Morgan’s. He knocked on the door, flowers in hand. His heart was hammering in his chest while he waited, jumping at the sudden barking of Clooney. It had slipped his mind that Morgan had a dog.

Morgan opened the door, a little shocked to see Reid with a bouquet of flowers. “What’s up, Pretty Boy?” 

“I-I…” Reid’s heart was suddenly in his throat and he gulped. “I talked to JJ and I didn’t know yesterday was supposed to date.” the young doctor paused. “I didn’t- I haven’t been on a date before. I didn’t know that-”

“Spencer, Spencer. Slow down. It’s okay. Why don’t you come in?” Morgan opened the door a little wider led Reid in with a gentle hand on his forearm. Reid followed inside and Morgan closed the door behind them. 

Clooney was sitting on the couch, completely ignoring the men without a care in the world. 

“I wanted to ask you out on a real date- one that I know is a date. JJ said flowers were a nice gesture.” 

Morgan chuckled and took the flowers from Reid when the latter offered them. “You’re sure this is something you’re okay, Spencer?”

“You aren’t pressuring me; this isn’t transference. I genuinely have feelings for you,” Spencer nodded, not breaking eye contact. 

The solid, unwavering eye contact was the note that assured Morgan he was serious. Spencer hated eye contact. It made him squirm and stutter. Spencer only ever made eye contact for longer than a split second when he was sure of a detail in a profile or he was info-dumping and the person he was talking to was honestly engaging back. 

“Alright, Pretty Boy,” Morgan nodded with a smile. “We’ll go on a real date. We’ll think of something.” The man was already formulating ideas for the date. Somewhere that wasn’t too bright or loud, somewhere that didn’t serve spicy food. It narrowed things down some. 

“I-I know I’m not an easy person. I just...something’s good,” he tried to explain. “I don’t... “ he stopped and took a deep breath.

“You ain’t gotta know, man. Sometimes, ya just gotta go with it.” 

“Just gotta go with it,” Reid repeated with a smile.


End file.
